Custom Bats Cricket Forum
Equipment => Your Kit => Topic started by: WABH-J on September 02, 2011, 03:29:50 PM
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So here's the story, I really wanted some new gear as mine is getting old and dirty however there's no way I coud afford to get decent stuff at full price. I play a good standard of village cricket but that's it, so sponsorship was completely out of the question.......or was it?
Lying awake one night I started formulating a joke sponsorship form in my head. I then wrote it out, added some home truths in the end and sent it off to loads of companies I admire not expecting any replies. Here's what I sent.
Dear "X" Cricket,
I am writing to you to apply for sponsorship from your cricket equipment company.
In return I can offer you many things. Sadly none of these things is nationwide television coverage of me scoring a century at Lords with your equipment (even Edgbaston would be pushing it if I’m honest). What you will receive is a polite, well groomed young man with absolutely no ungainly facial hair or tattoos (this can however be arranged if you wish), who will act as a proud and faithful ambassador to you. I also promise to do my upmost to stay at the crease for as long as possible in order to display your equipment to what I’m sure will be envious onlookers, on a rather fine clothes horse if I do say so myself. I’m also a dab hand at marketing and have several very successful techniques for promoting items which could include your cricket equipment. An example of this is a recording of an etherial, angelic like choir that I keep in my cricket bag, so that when a piece of equipment is removed from the bag the sound floods the dressing room. This has the effect of announcing to fellow team members that the equipment being used is sent from the Gods themselves, and all bearing your logo. Hey presto you have a publicity plan which, in my mind, is superior to that of excalibur. Or I could deploy more underhand tactics of using equipment by your rivals, damaging it in some way (for example the partial removal of a bat handle), then wait for it to break during a match whilst exclaiming “This would never have happened if I were using an "X" bat, I hear they’re the best. In the Universe.”
By now you will be asking why this well spoken, athletic and extraordinarily handsome young man (you’ll have to trust me) is wasting your precious time. Joking aside I am an impoverished student whose one true love is cricket. I truly relish returning home from University to play for my village side (on a Saturday and a Sunday in order to fulfill by cricketing addiction). My well loved equipment is however becoming tired and decrepit, and in between studying hard for my degree and fulfilling my obligations with the British Army who are sponsoring me through University and whom I will be joining on completion of my degree, I have not found the time or the funds to replace it. In reality I am not of course applying for sponsorship but am (extremely cheekily I’m aware) fishing for any discount, however small, on your fine equipment as I have long been an admirer of your fine brand.
If you’ve got this far, good on you...you’re a far better man/woman than I. That’s not a joke about transvestites.
Kind Regards,
....
I was offered part sponsorship by:
Shark Cricket
Choice Willow
&
Woodstock Cricket
Salix stated that they were "highly amused" but still asked me to fill out a sponsorship form. It looked long and boring so Instead I sent a message back that read Would it not be enough just to tell you that I am a superb cricket player and a compulsive liar?
they were amused by this but again asked me to fill out a form, which I didn't because I knew I had nothing worthy to put on it and I had already chosen my favourite....
Highlights from the replies include:
For the sheer entertainment value of your request, which of course we expect you to carry out to the letter we would be happy to offer a reduced price sponsorship. My wife has also said she would need a photo to back up your claims!!
- John, Woodstock Cricket
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Well what can i say, that's the best part spons CV that i have read
Gary, Choice Willow
I decided to go with Woodstock Cricket because I really liked John and he got my order to me in under 24 hours....here's some pictures of it:
(http://i369.photobucket.com/albums/oo134/5hogarth/DSCF0520.jpg)
(http://i369.photobucket.com/albums/oo134/5hogarth/DSCF0526.jpg)
(http://i369.photobucket.com/albums/oo134/5hogarth/DSCF0527.jpg)
(http://i369.photobucket.com/albums/oo134/5hogarth/DSCF0528.jpg)
(http://i369.photobucket.com/albums/oo134/5hogarth/DSCF0525.jpg)
(http://i369.photobucket.com/albums/oo134/5hogarth/DSCF0530.jpg)
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Nice to see a different tact being taken other than blowing your own whistle!
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Well done! How many more companies will receive similar letters now that you've publicised yours? ;)
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Well done! How many more companies will receive similar letters now that you've publicised yours? ;)
Wonder how many will receive an exact copy of the one he posted, hahah
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I pity all the brand who will receive around 500 emails from every 15 year old who reads this thread, adding at to the message 'he got something, so should I'.
:D
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Superb work! Well done!
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You get used to the volume of sponsorship requests i can assure you....any now the season if finished people seem to think its a good time to apply ;)
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PS I think my pet gerbil once recieved an offer of sponsorship from Shark :D
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Did you get full sponsorship? or a discount for bulk buy? just re-read and saw you said part sponsorship
nice letter btw :)
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PS I think my pet gerbil once recieved an offer of sponsorship from Shark
Same sort of standard as me then!
Did you get full sponsorship? or a discount for bulk buy?
nice letter btw
Neither, it was certain amounts of money off of items but I don't want to reveal what they were as that would set a precedent. Thanks :D
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Brilliant letter, loved it. & the cricket gear looks good as well.
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how much you get off ?
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That's a nice bat, nice grain and profile. Before today I hadn't heard of woodstock... :o
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Thats quite brilliant, they would have binned many other letters so you have done well there and the kit looks bloody lovely.Nice one there.
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how much you get off ?
More than I deserve, and that's as much as I'm prepared to say!
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Just been out in the nets and the Woodstock is incredible, easily the best bat I've owned out of Warsops, Dukes, Slazengers and Kookaburras...it's a far better bat than I am a player! What was surprising about the bat was how responsive the toe was, when I looked at it I thought the bottom four inches would be like a plank but if anything it was better than the middle on my old bat! The quality of the softs for the price is outstanding, particularly the pads.
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Haha, quality tactic, certainly a great letter and a brilliant angle to use in order to get the sponsors, hats off to you squire!!
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I guess these companies are so used to people claiming to be the next superstar they probably found the sheer cheeky honesty in your approach refreshing! good on you!
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As Tom has mentioned some brands get used to the volume of sponsorship requests , some requests are funny to say the very least. It still surprises me at times how many great cricketers that are on this planet that do not have a shilling to their name.
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good work, a very entertaining letter. I'm glad you got some sort of sponsorship to reward your time and effort.
The woodstock gear looks very tasty, how would you compare it to Newbery gear? i know its very similar, but just wanted to know if the quality was the same.....
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good work, a very entertaining letter. I'm glad you got some sort of sponsorship to reward your time and effort.
The woodstock gear looks very tasty, how would you compare it to Newbery gear? i know its very similar, but just wanted to know if the quality was the same.....
How would I compare it to Newbery gear? I would go as far as to say it is of comparable quality for a very reduced price! John, the chap who owns it used to work for them and was quite high up in the set up. The curve is that bat I use and to be frank it's a far better bat than I am a player, but I'm sure you already knew that! If I were to compare it to a Newberry model I would say it looks extremely similar to a Newbery GT 335 bat. The pads I got are to all intents and purposes Identical to the top of the range Newbery SPS and are basically half to 2/3rds the price depending on where you look!
EDIT: Browsing online I've noticed the Woodstock gloves look very similar to the Newbery gloves but I must confess I've never handled the pair I'm looking at so they may just be aesthetically similar!
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Was forwarded a few weeks back a copycat one of these from a forum member sent to a cricket company.
Come on, who else has tried this tactic? Any success?
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First time I've been on here for a while! I'd just like to say in response to the chap who has posted above me and for the record generally, the letter was completely my own work. I ripped off nobody to create this letter and I assure you, you will not find any copy-cat letters dated pre August 31 @ 01:19 as that's when I sent it!
Not 'having a go' but if there's one thing I will take pride in it's the letter, you can say what you like about my cricket but this letter was all mine!
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i think tom is saying!
some one coppied your letter not you coppied some one else's!!!
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I'm pretty sure that's how Phil Hughes got sponsored too!
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I'm pretty sure that's how Phil Hughes got sponsored too!
I thought as much but I'm just setting the record straight so I needn't confront it later on!
Edit: Quoted the wrong person....doh!
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I'm pretty sure that's how Phil Hughes got sponsored too!
i dont think he got that joke lolz!
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haha quality letter, well done sir! hats off to you!
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Brilliant letter well done!
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Honestly that is fantastic. I can understand why you got offers after reading that.
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Made my day! Wonderful stuff.
Gear looks great as well. A couple of people in my team have Woodstocks (TDF) and they are absolutely stunning bats.
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Love it! :D
Very well done!
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Great letter, now Ive got to write one of my own....not for cricket but for a nandos black card....dam I love chicken!