I was batting last year, when the player fielding at Cover started arguing with the Captain, claiming he should be put on to bowl. Well the Captain who was standing at slip, was having none of it! and he firmly told (in good old rural oxfordshire) the player "he was the Captain, he picks who bowl and when".
The fielder at Cover then folded his arms, pushed his bottom lip out and started kicking at the ground. Three balls later the arms were still crossed when I pushed the ball to his left. The ball ran passed him and gently down the slope towards the club house. The sulking player made no attempt to stop the ball, he just looked at the captain and smiled. He then turned and slowly ran after the now stationary ball, by the time he had reached the ball which was about 10 yards from the boundary edge, we were on our third run. In stead of picking the ball up and returning it to the keeper, the unhappy player transformed himself into Ronaldo and dribbled the ball towards the club house and the boundary. Stopping the ball a yard short of the rope he stopped turned toward the Captain and stuck two fingers up. He then toe punted the ball through the open door of the club house and he walked off the pitch and into the club house.
Minutes later the player emerged from the club house dragging his kit bag, and headed towards the car park. Stopping in his tracks, a look of horror came over the player as he realised, first he had not driven his car the 25 miles to the game and second he had given a lift by the now not so happy Captain.