Print

[Jagminder]

Please share the funny verbal exchanges you been part of on a cricket field.
This should make a good read (Hopefully).
I will start of with one - We call batsmen "Dr.WhyBother" ones who can't connect.

Jag.

[mr_wickets]

Or old pro used to lay into anyone who batted below 6 and didn't bowl by asking them "what were they here to do, dive the bus???" Someone came out wearing an "Aussie youth 'A'" shirt and got asked if he brought it in woolworths.

Funny guy.

[Jagminder]

Or old pro used to lay into anyone who batted below 6 and didn't bowl by asking them "what were they here to do, dive the bus???" Someone came out wearing an "Aussie youth 'A'" shirt and got asked if he brought it in woolworths.

Funny guy.

Good ones.

[LeonieKelly18]

One of our old players knew the batswoman knew aswell this batswoman had a liking for her, so she stood as close as was aloud by the umpire and said   whats your name luv, and winked. next ball she was gone.

[trypewriter]

One side that we played against last year had some very entertaining banter amongst themselves when fielding.
They were giving each other grief if they happened to drop the ball while returning it to the bowler. One guy dropped the ball, and claimed it was due to a poor throw, but one of his very insensitive teammates shouted: 'I heard you let Linda (obviously an ex) slip through your fingers as well.'
This did not go down well with the guy in question, and I thought things might go a bit further, especially when, later on, the guy who had dropped the ball was moaning that he hadn't been selected to keep wicket.
'I'm not called "The Cat' for nothing you know.' he remonstrated.
The same wag called out: 'We know all about that - you're called the cat because you had a (rhymes with hit) behind the sightscreen.'
Sometimes it really is worth umpiring...

[mattcoll12491]

One side that we played against last year had some very entertaining banter amongst themselves when fielding.
They were giving each other grief if they happened to drop the ball while returning it to the bowler. One guy dropped the ball, and claimed it was due to a poor throw, but one of his very insensitive teammates shouted: 'I heard you let Linda (obviously an ex) slip through your fingers as well.'
This did not go down well with the guy in question, and I thought things might go a bit further, especially when, later on, the guy who had dropped the ball was moaning that he hadn't been selected to keep wicket.
'I'm not called "The Cat' for nothing you know.' he remonstrated.
The same wag called out: 'We know all about that - you're called the cat because you had a (rhymes with hit) behind the sightscreen.'
Sometimes it really is worth umpiring...

When I was at university, we never really sledged the opposition more ourselves lol. We didn't take the game too seriously (most of the time...)

But the one thing that sticks in my mind is when we were fielding (and we were getting smoked) one of our players went up to the batsman, revealed his pubic hair and asked 'Have I cut these too short?' It must have majorly confused the batsman as the next ball he missed a straight one... Oh how we laughed our socks off

[uknsaunders]

I came into bat in a league game and the bowler whizzed the first ball past my outside edge. He took a stride down and said "Afternoon". Next ball was a nice half volley that I hit through extra for 3. As I was running down the pitch I said "and a good afternoon to you to". Made the umpire giggle!

[fatbats]

Played against a guy years ago who came out with no helmet saying he had faced garner in his youth so no one would trouble him

Needless to say we took up the challenge and managed to take his cap off and he ran to changing rooms to get a lid on haha

[uknsaunders]

Played against a guy years ago who came out with no helmet saying he had faced garner in his youth so no one would trouble him

Needless to say we took up the challenge and managed to take his cap off and he ran to changing rooms to get a lid on haha

had the opposite!

Back in the late eighties/early 90s we had a very young 2nd XI. Approx 7-8 of the side were 16-20, but most of them played for Bucks at colts level. We also had a captain not afraid get stuck in. Anyway, we were over at Farnham Royal on a typically lively surface. We scrapped and got to 200+. The oppo came out and tried to slog our young attack all over the park from ball one. Problem for them was our attack was considerably more lively than theirs and slogging only got the youngsters even more wound up. It all reached a peak when the number 8 came in with a helmet. Back then nobody wore a lid. His defence was "he had to go into work on the monday", which he told the young bowler. However, once he slogged a couple the helmet became a target and he didn't last long...

[SOULMAN1012]

Played a cup game a few years ago against Sutton cc. They were quite lively and had a big West Indian charging in from the top end. First ball wizzed past my outside edge and then next 2-3 did the same. Big guy at 2nd slip calls out "send him back he ain't told his mum his playing with the big boys". Next ball I nicked straight to him but it was going so quick it thumped him square in the chest before he even moved his hands. He had to go off with a little send off from me that I can not put on this forum. 

Also heard the bus driver one a few times.  As well as plenty of other silly and stupid comments from quick bowlers when they beat you first ball before I have dispatched there next ball. Always found a quick wink and a smile winds them up more than any words

[joeljonno]

Can't think of specifics but me and the skipper get some good back and fro banter going. I take 1st slip and he takes short leg and then discuss everything from the opposing village. As we ignore the bat, he normally ends up trying to chip in with comments which breaks his concentration.

[Manormanic]

A few years ago our veteran seamer made the same guy play and miss three or four times in a row.  After the last one he stood there puzzled, took his glasses off and walked over to hand them to the batsman....

Silent sledging!

[toenails97]

One of our old players knew the batswoman knew aswell this batswoman had a liking for her, so she stood as close as was aloud by the umpire and said   whats your name luv, and winked. next ball she was gone.

Haha that's got me in creases

[The_Bird]

One of our old players knew the batswoman knew aswell this batswoman had a liking for her, so she stood as close as was aloud by the umpire and said   whats your name luv, and winked. next ball she was gone.

That would've finished me off as well....

[safcdeans23]

try and be as chirpy as possible. had some great ones with one lad at huntly playing for the 2nds.

one i recall was actually 2 1st teamers watching our game, one was our overseas who was from NZ and dark skinned. one of our bowlers bowled a horrible ball that should have been punished but was left alone, so our overseas goes for "that belongs in the trees" standing next to him is the 1st wicketkeeper who without thought goes for a standard come back of just repeating what was said just with "you" at the front, so he goes for "you belong in the trees Sachin" now everyone who hears this just stops in awe of his utter stupidity as he slowly realizes what hes said. we are all in stitches as Sach fakes offense and the lad trys to backtrack. still mentioned to this day! haha