Custom Bats Cricket Forum
General Cricket => Your Cricket => Topic started by: uknsaunders on January 10, 2013, 09:40:37 PM
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Much in the tradition of the Notting Hill "last brownie" scene, please give your reasons to claim the title of worst forum batsman. There must be a few out there with claims?
For those who have never watched Notting Hill, here's the clip in question:-
notting-hill-movie-clip-last-brownie (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uui3jdrph5Q#ws)
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i had a shocker of a season a few years back....46 runs all year at an average of 6.5 :(
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Opening batsman in a 4th XI with a career average of 8.4
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i had a shocker of a season a few years back....46 runs all year at an average of 6.5 :(
don't kid yourself Tom you score millions of runs!
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Good Eeeeeeeeeeeevening!
I'll just find my You Tube clips.
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I got bowled leaving on off stump two games in a row last year, it was horrible.
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i had a shocker of a season a few years back....46 runs all year at an average of 6.5 :(
Tom stop being modest, you are one of the better players I've seen on the forum....
I think I know who I would nominate ;)
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i had a shocker of a season a few years back....46 runs all year at an average of 6.5 :(
How do you bounce back after such a season ?. :(
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I think there is a big whale to come in yet and it's not fattus....
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I can hold my own in an 'all the gear no idea' contest any day ;)
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I hold bat backwards and upside down does that count??
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Ok, so despite spending £300 in kit last season I averaged 2.3 batting mainly at 4, I have since gone on a spending spree and bought around £700 (and that doesn't include what im spending on coaching) of kit to console myself that if this season is any worse than last at least I'll look good (and even that's questionable)! I will make one exception and that is that I've only been back playing for 2 seasons after 15 years out if the game!
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I hold bat backwards and upside down does that count??
you played for a welsh minor county, go away! lol
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Not me ;)
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Damn you keep bringing that up makes me sound less of a specialist fine leg
Damn you
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Averaged 6 in 8 innings last year for our 2's. Total of 36 runs including 2 not outs. Shambles :(
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Ok, so despite spending £300 in kit last season I averaged 2.3 batting mainly at 4, I have since gone on a spending spree and bought around £700 (and that doesn't include what im spending on coaching) of kit to console myself that if this season is any worse than last at least I'll look good (and even that's questionable)! I will make one exception and that is that I've only been back playing for 2 seasons after 15 years out if the game!
I feel 2.3 average seems to be a bit high and Charlie has only been back 2 seasons.
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How do you bounce back after such a season ?. :(
dropped down to the 2nds and scored a few, worked hard in nets and averaged a fair few more the year after in the 1st's again...hard work and better mental approach i think
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I could be in with a shout here, i had a shocker last year injured or not... i may as well have taken up monkey tennis. :(
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im not going to name names who i think is worse lol
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A couple of years ago I averaged 2.8 after 5 innings' at a very mediocre level on a Sunday..
Couldn't hit a cow's **** with a banjo that year..
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Bruce 1 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bu1tEixpa-s#ws)
There you go - you can't coach technique like that!
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love u bruce! epic lad
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youtube vids wont work on ipad :(
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youtube vids wont work on ipad :(
I clicked 'Bruce 1' and it worked. The video is not embedded into the forum post as it probably should be though
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all is right in the world again now i have seen Bruceys flamboyant master strokes in action again to refresh my memory
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There you go - you can't coach technique like that!
Seen a lot worse. Some nice shots there Bruce ;)
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Simmy, who were you going to name?
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Seen a lot worse. Some nice shots there Bruce ;)
u watching same video? :o
;)
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I think James reads the game very well thanks.
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FC has brought video proof to his case but he did ruin it by middling a couple
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u watching same video? :o
;)
@ 1.21 - look at the classic prod through midwicket. I showed that machine who was boss!
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I want to feel involved :(
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@ 1.21 - look at the classic prod through midwicket. I showed that machine who was boss!
like I said, 'some' good shots ;)
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HS of 12, average around 5. Hang around for 5 overs and well have a carbon copy finish to my innings of edging to the keeper, bat to the ground look at the umpire, nod and walk off the field.
Went back to my old club to play a game got a duck in 4 balls after moaning about not having a chance to bat....whoops
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Bruce 1 ([url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bu1tEixpa-s#ws[/url])
There you go - you can't coach technique like that!
That first shot...you even held the pose for the cameras. I have never laughed so loud in a crowded office before...top work bud ;)
Saying that, my batting has been (No Swearing Please) for a while now, I back my ability but my mental game is shot to (No Swearing Please)! Help....me.... :(
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Re: Worst Forum Batsman
me!
my bowling is legendary though
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dangerous when not in a confined space and having a wall on leg side to bounce back off!
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I managed to go from averaging 27 in my first season over here to 4.8 this season, it's a good job I bowl and skipper!
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Back in cricket after a 25 year break - and it was like I'd never been away!
0, 0, 2, 4, 5, 14*, 5
And this is the clincher - last game of the season - I couldn't play - so someone put in a ringer under my name in the scorebook - and he got 0 as well!
I'm so bad that even when I'm not there I'm getting 0! :D :D :D :D :D
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Bruce 1 ([url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bu1tEixpa-s#ws[/url])
There you go - you can't coach technique like that!
Anyone else notice the distinct resemblence with Boxing "guru" Steve Bunce?
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I would rather get my minimal runs in a few overs than one chap at my club, who in one game faced 97balls and got a grand total of 9 runs. Safe to say we lost the game and I got very bored watching
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I would rather get my minimal runs in a few overs than one chap at my club, who in one game faced 97balls and got a grand total of 9 runs. Safe to say we lost the game and I got very bored watching
Joey, That guy must have shown a specatle in the art of defence.
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worse still he got a 4 in there as well early on. After that leaving the wicket would have been good to see.
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so many choices, I think we draw up a short list of candidates and then monitor how bad they are in the 2013 season.
Who's on the list for the shootout?
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expect for one or 2 matches last season i never lasted more than an over, never beaten or bowled but always caught on the boundary...aim for 2013 is to bat longer....started most games with a 6 or 4 or out caught :(
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worse still he got a 4 in there as well early on. After that leaving the wicket would have been good to see.
Sounds like my brother, he hit 7 in 22 overs then moaned that they messed is score up by one run! I hit 42 in about 14 overs batting with him, and asked him if there was any chance he could maybe help score some runs. His response was, he couldn't see the ball. My response, you've been batting 15 overs so far. Yep still can't see it though!
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Definitely on the shortlist for 2013:-
Fattus
Charlie15
Anybody have any views on the others?
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So to highlight, I play friendly cricket, with people usually around 25 years older than me. I average about 8 on a good year, mainly as I get random scores mixed with a lot of 1's!
Im doing the net at the Choice Cricket, and im now dreading it!
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Definitely on the shortlist for 2013:-
Fattus
Charlie15
Anybody have any views on the others?
Excellent little v large! :D :D :D ;)
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could we do a forum member knockout style tournament? One for batsmen and one for the bowlers, even stick the keepers in.
number of runs scored at the weekend, then into the next week...
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Wow. Seeing some of these stats makes me feel a lot better. I am not the worst! I scored 52 runs at an average of 13 and only batted 5 times.... Although that includes two big fat 0s.
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expect for one or 2 matches last season i never lasted more than an over, never beaten or bowled but always caught on the boundary...aim for 2013 is to bat longer....started most games with a 6 or 4 or out caught :(
My first two 0s this season were like that - perished in the deep... :o
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Wow. Seeing some of these stats makes me feel a lot better. I am not the worst! I scored 52 runs at an average of 13 and only batted 5 times.... Although that includes two big fat 0s.
Boy at the game! :D :D
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This makes me feel a little better.
I thought I had a bad season(batting wise) as I didn't get a ton in 2012.
But surely I still need to justify all 6 of my Pro level bats :D
Jag.
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I got praise off the captain in one game for steadying the innings by getting 5 off 4 overs (only faced 6balls). A strange feeling.
I left a lot of runs out there this year. My problem is after facing about 7balls I hit a 4. Then I think im god, go for the clog and get caught.
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This makes me feel a little better.
I thought I had a bad season(batting wise) as I didn't get a ton in 2012.
But surely I still need to justify all 6 of my Pro level bats :D
Jag.
Yes you do Jag - don't expect any sympathy from us 'ferrets' :D :D :D
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I got praise off the captain in one game for steadying the innings by getting 5 off 4 overs (only faced 6balls). A strange feeling.
I left a lot of runs out there this year. My problem is after facing about 7balls I hit a 4. Then I think im god, go for the clog and get caught.
Reminds me of my best innings when I held up one end in an early season game on a wicket that bore some semblance to parts of the Western Front, 6 from around 15 overs while the guy at the other end made 50! It was my top score until the end of the season when I made 10 :)!
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Reminds me of my best innings when I held up one end in an early season game on a wicket that bore some semblance to parts of the Western Front, 6 from around 15 overs while the guy at the other end made 50! It was my top score until the end of the season when I made 10 :)!
My 14* was like that :-[
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5 innings, 42 runs at 8.4 - Get in there!!
Cripes! I only batted 5 times all season last year - no wonder I'm Poocakes! Gotta sort that out this year!
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Annoyingly your a much better batter than me! I now seriously doubt my own ability!
By the way where was that video taken
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Too bad its doesn't show the strike rate, it would the highest # on my batting charts...not proud of it but here it is...(all time is over 3 seasons 10/11/12) :(
(http://i1212.photobucket.com/albums/cc453/tusharsehgal/TusharStats_zps84b8e86a.png)
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Yes you do Jag - don't expect any sympathy from us 'ferrets' :D :D :D
That cracked in up real good at work :D :D
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So to highlight, I play friendly cricket, with people usually around 25 years older than me. I average about 8 on a good year, mainly as I get random scores mixed with a lot of 1's!
Im doing the net at the Choice Cricket, and im now dreading it!
Nah, you're not that bad. There are far worse batsmen on here that you!
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I reckon I've got you guys covered..... each year at presentation, I am called upon to present the duck trophy to the earner of the most ducks.
An honour I get for a few years ago amassing 8 ducks in 13 innings including 6 on the trot.
I still hold the record for most ducks in a season and most consecutive ducks.
I am having an absolutely stellar year at the moment averaging 9!
Will dig up some stats!
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I managed a 40 ball duck a while back which still gets brought up by my mates on a regular basis :(
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40 ball duck!!!!!!!!!! Big respect for that!
If I stayed in for that long I'd have a fifty!
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40 ball duck!!!!!!!!!! Big respect for that!
If I stayed in for that long I'd have a fifty!
I'd have 100 :( lol but then I reckon thats probably 98% of my problem
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40 ball duck!!!!!!!!!! Big respect for that!
If I stayed in for that long I'd have a fifty!
Yea very wet pitch, outfield not cut for seemingly weeks, no pace on the ball and batting with an injured 60 year old added up to a quite excruciating experience all round >:(
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I managed a 40 ball duck a while back which still gets brought up by my mates on a regular basis :(
One of our lads did that so we now call him "crispy duck" because he was in too long.
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I managed a 40 ball duck a while back which still gets brought up by my mates on a regular basis :(
How local are you to West London?! ;)
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How local are you to West London?! ;)
Not at all why? Trying to recruit me to steady a ropey batting line up with a slid block and a classy leave?!
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Not quite upto roger Davis 20 over duck...that was eppppic!
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Not quite upto roger Davis 20 over duck...that was eppppic!
Dammit I can't even be the best at getting a duck :D
Doesn't surprise me about Roger, what a legend
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Where do you play Dan W?
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West London - nets near Notting Hill, home ground towards Hammersmith/Fulham - I think it's the Middlesex league (I don't get too involved in league/fixture matters).
BTW FC - you're my batting twin - I could watch you bat all day :) - every shot is the most overly gracious glowing marquee drive to long on/off that encourages rapturous appluase before the follow through has even finished...Just sometimes the ball isn't in the right place, eh?!
The look of pleasure (at the action) that turns instantly into dismay as it hits the net behind is exactly how I feel every shot!
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Not at all why? Trying to recruit me to steady a ropey batting line up with a slid block and a classy leave?!
Trust me buddy, you'd fit right in. Do you prefer to face or open at the bowlers end ;)
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Trust me buddy, you'd fit right in. Do you prefer to face or open at the bowlers end ;)
Ill take strike, more opportunity to show off flamboyant leaves ;)
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I once scored 17 in 41 overs 8)
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could we do a forum member knockout style tournament? One for batsmen and one for the bowlers, even stick the keepers in.
number of runs scored at the weekend, then into the next week...
I think this is a brilliant idea. Maybe some of us sponsors can rustle up some prizes for the 'winner'
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I would rather get my minimal runs in a few overs than one chap at my club, who in one game faced 97balls and got a grand total of 9 runs. Safe to say we lost the game and I got very bored watching
This reminds me of my time as a nipper, when I regularly played Sunday 2's cricket, which was mostly friendly matches, with the odd cup game. I always looked forward to one particular away friendly because of what happened the first time I went.
The opposition skipper must have been in his sixties and was rather well, rotund. So big in fact that his whites didn't fit him anymore, he had removed the drawstring and his wife had sewn in an elastic patch into the bum of his trousers for some stretch.
He opened the batting and amassed a mesmerising 13* from 40 overs, including numerous times where he turned down an extra run because his trousers had fallen down!
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I would rather get my minimal runs in a few overs than one chap at my club, who in one game faced 97balls and got a grand total of 9 runs. Safe to say we lost the game and I got very bored watching
Can't beat me. I played one game, where I faced the best part of 32 overs, for 6 runs.
That season, I scored a grand total of 29 runs at an average of 3.63.
Someone guess my batting position.
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He opened the batting and amassed a mesmerising 13* from 40 overs, including numerous times where he turned down an extra run because his trousers had fallen down!
its a red inker.
"red inker" the thing I hate to hear when I get 0*. Yes it is a red inker, but I have got nothing to add to the red ink. Nothing!!!
wooow 9 of 32 overs, I hope there was someone scoring runs at the other end. What was the team total after that?
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Faced 32 overs? You must be a hero! I still maintain that my getting 0 when I wasn't even playing puts me in a different class! :D
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This story is completely true and will never happen again.
Back in the late 80's a batter called Ian Smith was playing Sunday Friendlies for us. He managed to record 6 golden ducks on the trot - on his seventh knock his stroked his first ball just wide of cover. Ian shouted yes and sprinted towards the non-strikers end, his bat held aloft in triumph. However, the other batter shouts no as Ian gets halfway down, the throw goes to the keeper and he gets run out.
I kid you not. I was there. I have never laughed so much in my life. :D
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This story is completely true and will never happen again.
Back in the late 80's a batter called Ian Smith was playing Sunday Friendlies for us. He managed to record 6 golden ducks on the trot - on his seventh knock his stroked his first ball just wide of cover. Ian shouted yes and sprinted towards the non-strikers end, his bat held aloft in triumph. However, the other batter shouts no as Ian gets halfway down, the throw goes to the keeper and he gets run out.
I kid you not. I was there. I have never laughed so much in my life. :D
Hahahaha!!!!! Hilarious!
Nah, not many people scored runs in that match, we were bundled out for 45.
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last season I managed a overall total of 28 from maybe 9 innings, high score of 10. last season is my best to date!
a picture tells 1000 words...
(http://i1290.photobucket.com/albums/b530/Deans23SAFC/jmzhg_zpsa5c6523b.jpg)
nets last season
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last season I managed a overall total of 28 from maybe 9 innings, high score of 10. last season is my best to date!
a picture tells 1000 words...
([url]http://i1290.photobucket.com/albums/b530/Deans23SAFC/jmzhg_zpsa5c6523b.jpg[/url])
nets last season
I think we have a new contender for me and Fattus to fight off!
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I think this is a brilliant idea. Maybe some of us sponsors can rustle up some prizes for the 'winner'
How have I only just seen this. Anyone fancy a knockout of the worst player wins?
There would be pleasure in being knocked out as you have been slightly better than someone else that week.
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I think we have a new contender for me and Fattus to fight off!
im my slight defense 8 of those 9 innings were at 9 and had very little overs to play with. I got to open once and cracked off my wonderful 10 8) so im claiming lack of opportunities for my poor showing :D
It would be a pleasure to go against yourself and Fattus! might spur me on a bit haha!
(http://i1290.photobucket.com/albums/b530/Deans23SAFC/jmcuc_zps4e38972a.jpg)
sometimes I do hit the thing...
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How many of our "poor batsmen" are actually bowlers though?
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Could have different one, bat between 1-4 5-7 8-onwards. I tend to bat between 4-6 and get no runs.
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we ould have a worst bowler thread...I'd be a good contender (and certainly the worst bowler to have played rep cricket a a bowler!!!)
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How many of our "poor batsmen" are actually bowlers though?
Not me, bat 4/5/6, and if you think my batting is bad you wait until you see my bowling!
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I'm an all-rounder (in many senses)
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How many of our "poor batsmen" are actually bowlers though?
None of our poor batsmen are actually bowlers. All of our bowlers are actually allrounders ;)
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Im always the best batsman in the nets!
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None of our poor batsmen are actually bowlers. All of our bowlers are actually allrounders ;)
Thank you :D
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my 2008 figures as a 17year old
39 runs at an average of 4.33 with 4 ducks!
http://havantcc.play-cricket.com/scoreboard/individualPerformanceResults.asp?seasonID=9&userID=436119&ruleTypeID=6101 (http://havantcc.play-cricket.com/scoreboard/individualPerformanceResults.asp?seasonID=9&userID=436119&ruleTypeID=6101)
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In a season I once got 0, 0, 0, 0, 5. The 5 being in the plate after we won the league so technically I never got a league run that season.
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I'm currently averaging 3.5 from 3 knocks so far
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my 2008 figures as a 17year old
39 runs at an average of 4.33 with 4 ducks!
[url]http://havantcc.play-cricket.com/scoreboard/individualPerformanceResults.asp?seasonID=9&userID=436119&ruleTypeID=6101[/url] ([url]http://havantcc.play-cricket.com/scoreboard/individualPerformanceResults.asp?seasonID=9&userID=436119&ruleTypeID=6101[/url])
Looks like you improved a bit though!!!
http://havantcc.play-cricket.com/content/view.asp?id=10285227&cid=218&tid=14&referer=&fixture=&team=19130 (http://havantcc.play-cricket.com/content/view.asp?id=10285227&cid=218&tid=14&referer=&fixture=&team=19130)
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fourth team micky mouse cricket unfortunatly