I'll have a go...
Before:
"The Newbery name is synonymous with quality and performance used by many of the world’s finest batsmen. The bats are hand crafted in England to create the best in power balance and performance from each individual piece of willow. Experience and skill handed down through generations mean that your Newbery bat is the absolute pinnacle of quality in bat choice."
After:
"The Newbery name is synonymous with quality and performance and is used by many of the world’s finest batsmen. The bats are hand-crafted in England to create the best in power, balance and performance from each individual piece of willow. Experience and skill, handed down through generations, means that your Newbery bat is the absolute pinnacle of quality in bat choice."
It is appallingly written, not just in terms of grammar but style also. The text flows really badly and reads more like a GCSE exam answer than a bit of marketing blurb..anyway.
Let me know where I've messed up!