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Author Topic: Why Newbery?  (Read 5434 times)

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Bats_Entertainment

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Why Newbery?
« on: October 08, 2013, 12:22:01 PM »

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Gingerbusiness

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Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #1 on: October 08, 2013, 12:25:04 PM »

That is what happens when you let the work experience kid update your website...
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joeljonno

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Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #2 on: October 08, 2013, 12:29:05 PM »

Why don't you put on here the correct grammar for the paragraph then?
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MD2812

Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #3 on: October 08, 2013, 12:35:40 PM »

Why don't you put on here the correct grammar for the paragraph then?

I like this, I can read and write but my grammar isn't the greatest. Would be good to see how they compare.

Maybe Newbery need to be sent to The Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good and Wanna Learn to Do Other Stuff Good Too

ProWannabe88

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Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #4 on: October 08, 2013, 01:16:17 PM »

Christ!! You need a deep breath before having a go at that bad boy.
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imran75

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Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #5 on: October 08, 2013, 01:27:07 PM »

I'll have a go...

Before:
"The Newbery name is synonymous with quality and performance used by many of the world’s finest batsmen. The bats are hand crafted in England to create the best in power balance and performance from each individual piece of willow. Experience and skill handed down through generations mean that your Newbery bat is the absolute pinnacle of quality in bat choice."

After:
"The Newbery name is synonymous with quality and performance and is used by many of the world’s finest batsmen. The bats are hand-crafted in England to create the best in power, balance and performance from each individual piece of willow. Experience and skill, handed down through generations, means that your Newbery bat is the absolute pinnacle of quality in bat choice."

It is appallingly written, not just in terms of grammar but style also. The text flows really badly and reads more like a GCSE exam answer than a bit of marketing blurb..anyway.

Let me know where I've messed up!
« Last Edit: October 08, 2013, 01:29:35 PM by imran75 »
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ItsJustCricket

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Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #6 on: October 08, 2013, 01:35:18 PM »

It is a bit OTT and looks like they are trying a bit too hard.  I have read worse though...

imran75

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Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #7 on: October 08, 2013, 01:39:35 PM »

I should post some of the rubbish I have to read through every day! :)
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Jacky

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Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #8 on: October 08, 2013, 01:48:22 PM »

So are Newbery stocking Power Balances now? I though they were a thing of the past ;)
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tim2000s

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Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #9 on: October 08, 2013, 01:49:46 PM »

Why don't you put on here the correct grammar for the paragraph then?
Ah! You wrote it!
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joeljonno

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Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #10 on: October 08, 2013, 02:38:52 PM »

Ah! You wrote it!

Nope, I use too many commas when I type, generally.  In that was none at all.
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Number4

Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #11 on: October 08, 2013, 07:31:00 PM »

Must be running out of cricket topics if we need to worry about this sort of rubbish now. Who cares... Seriously
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Bats_Entertainment

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Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #12 on: October 09, 2013, 12:08:09 PM »

Thought they were a quality brand?
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Bats_Entertainment

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Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #13 on: October 09, 2013, 12:10:09 PM »

Must be running out of cricket topics if we need to worry about this sort of rubbish now. Who cares... Seriously

I do. I worry about the decline in standards in this country.
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ajmw89

Re: Why Newbery?
« Reply #14 on: October 09, 2013, 01:20:52 PM »

Who gives a flying fart?  If you have an issue with Newbery's grammar, take it up with them!  We are here to discuss cricket bats and kit, not be grammar nazis...

P.S.  I hope my grammar doesn't offend you!
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