Can't find it. Glad to see it's not just England struggling at the moment against average competition.
Ashes could resemble those two drunk blokes in the pub hopelessly swinging and missing at each other.
Australia : oi ! oi ! Arrrrgh yooz toorkin to meee ma ma maaate ? Loookin at mememate ?
England : yesh , i warsh toorkin to yoozsh ! Wannna gooo ?
Australia : oorriighty theen , lestsh goo oooudshide an foight !
England : finede , lestsh gooo .
Australia : ohh , faaarck it , I'll buuy ya a drinnk .
England : greeaat , youu wannnt ush too geet shome chiips toouuo ?
Result : 5 days of stodgy cricket and a draw .